rantings of the ill and feverish

I'm sick...I've been sick for a couple of days but managed to get to work anyway....today, my son is sick, too, though and my wife is away at a conference, so it was just, "okay, the hell with it, we'll all stay home"....the bad thing is that my son has already been out of school since Tuesday with "pink eye", which I don't remember ever having and have no experience dealing with....wow, an actual video on MTV...sometimes Bono can be such a pompous dick....anyway, yesterday, I call the school to make arrangements to get Bailey's homework and they say, "You know that he's allowed back in school after he goes to the doctor and gets eyedrops, don't you?" NO, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT; NO ONE MENTIONED THAT TO ME AND NOW HE'S BEEN OUT SINCE TUESDAY!" But now he and I both have fever, chills, etc.....so why the hell am I sitting at a computer?....Hmm...Eric Roberts is in both a Killers video and a Mariah Carey video....went to video store; picked up "Oceans 12" for Carrie, "Sideways" for me, "Fat Albert" cartoons for Bailey, "Hilary Duff In Concert" for Mackenzie, and "Lemony Snicket" for all of us, I guess....my son is now obsessed with Fat Albert cartoons after seeing the live-action movie (which was dreadful).....I think the budget for each Fat Albert cartoon must have been about $12.00.....I swear, one of the characters will say something funny (allegedly) and then they cut to a stock shot of the whole gang laughing....trouble is, the "gang shot" includes the person who told the joke....when you're down to Liberace and Pat Boone, it's time to lay off of downloading for awhile....will be glad when Carrie gets back.....she's sick, too, though....considering changing band name to "No Jake Brakes".....in a feverish state last night, I answered the phone and some fast-talking young lady from BMG Music Service somehow got me to agree to something....I'm not sure what....need to check on that....I think it involves receiving Blink 182, Velvet Revolver, and No Doubt cds in the future that I don't want....I'll send 'em back and get the usual stern letter from them....Mary Tyler Moore was pretty damned hot in her "Dick Van Dyke" days...Gwen Stefani is pretty damned hot in that cheerleader outfit in the "Hollaback" video...Shelley Winters was pretty damned hot in "The Poseidon Adventure"...okay, that was one too many....surprised that Constantine is gone from "Idol"....In a "special edition" of the show, I think that Paula should be voted off.....please,please don't let the little blonde girl win....there are way too many teenage girl singers crowding the airwaves already......her country clone unjustly won "Nashville Star" the other night over a much more talented, authentically country competitor....I've always loved George Carlin, but his new book is more bitter than funny....Rosie, I'm sure Dave is crying himself to sleep over the fact that you're boycotting his show...Wilford Brimley wants to help me get diabetes supplies more cheaply and efficiently....WILL THERE EVER BE A NEW "LOST" EPISODE?.....Wondering if "Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy" will be any good....didn't read the book....the fact that it is being heavily advertised on Nickelodeon makes me skeptical....but it stars "Tim" from BBC's "The Office" and I like him....children still asleep; very peaceful around here....need to figure out which cat is peeing next to the litter box rather than IN the litter box; highly annoying....nothing tastes good...I've lost about 15 pounds; miles to go, though....Lucy & Ethel are up to something....Ignore these four words (Carlin).....this concludes feverish rantings; must lie down....